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DRESSING THE RANCH - Curb Appeal Advice For Ranch-Style Houses

By: Michelle Molinari


Despite dozens of books and articles hailing the distinctive architectural history and extremely functional layout of the typical ranch-style house, many owners of these horizontal slices of Americana seem ashamed disdainful of the lineage of their very own homes.

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Sometimes referred to as "California Ramblers", and "Ranch-Burgers", the post-WWII Ranch-Style House, by some estimates, comprises 70% of houses built between 1945 and 1970. By my own estimate, I'd venture to guess that 99% of the owners of these houses wish their homes were a different architectural style.

Addressing curb-appeal issues and advising exterior paint colors for our clientele is what we love to sink our teeth into, and nothing gets us salivating more than a good old fashioned Ranch-Burger.

Here in Louisiana, the Ranch-Burger (a name coined, no doubt, by it's flat and meat-patty-esque silhouette) is the complete antithesis of our famous architectural influence, New Orleans' French Quarter. In the course of a week's time, we console, and then attempt to counsel, at least 5 to 10 closeted Ranch owners about the reason their house looks the way it does. In complete denial, they describe their house somewhat evasively, avoiding our eyes, drawing pictures to work from, and deflecting direct questions such as, "Do you own a Ranch?"

Mentioning the low-slung roof and the clean, unadorned style causes flinches of pain to flash across their brow, as if we are purposely rubbing salt into their wounds. Finally, they capitulate, "Yes, it is, and I hate it."

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Then they quickly go on and tell us of all their plans to abuse and humiliate their minimalist, modern-era classic, with the addition of a wild tri-color scheme, porches, shutters, ironwork, awnings, and ultimately, a steeper-pitched roof. In short, they want us to co-sign their plan to turn what they feel is a sow'sear, into what they can percieve as a silk purse.

And so, we mentally gird ourselves for battle. We square our shoulders, focus intently into their beseeching eyes, and we deliver unto them the terrible truth about ranch houses. We each have our own versions of the following dialog chiseled into the bone on the inside of our foreheads. When it appears our eyes have turned heaven-ward to seek divine intercession, we are actually reading from our script, with all the solemnity and compassion of a funerary officiator: "Ms. So and So, the goal of our appointment is to give you the best advice we can, and not take all day to do it. The outcome of your plans to drastically obscure the structure of your architecture away from it's original design will bear out a cosmetically bizarre faccade, not unlike Michael Jackson's face. Please, I implore you, embrace the style of your house and the surrounding neighborhood, and let's work on enhancing your present design, not obliterating it, to preserve the dignity of your Ranch, and ultimately, preserve your future equity."

Some clients, at this point, end our appointment in a huff. Most, however, let out a final, drawn-out sigh of defeat, but at least maintain the social courtesy of hearing us out. We press on, despite the glazed look and the slumped shoulders,

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"Ranch-Burgers were specifically designed without adornment. Their color schemes should reflect the more subdued colors found to blend in with natural surroundings. Usually only one trim and one body color are warranted, with perhaps a third color used sparingly, if at all. The front door steps back demurely from the view of the street. The end result should be a palette of ecologically inspired, low-key hues.

Drama, interest, and individuality are expressed in artful, well-tended landscaping. The elongated house is but a quiet backdrop. Nature and people are the main characters in a predominantly Ranch neighborhood, not the houses themselves.

It's just as wonderful a concept now as it was then."

The speeches rarely work. The ranch, once the most prolific and sought after style of architecture in North America, remains the red-headed step child of design. Sometimes, it seems they just have to see it for themselves, which is why we do what we do.




To Bling, Or Not to Bling...A Guide on How to Choose Your Trim Paint Color

By: Michelle Molinari


Trim choice is dictated largely by the body color of the house, and the overall architecture.

Basic color facts for exterior colors are that light colors appear to be lighter in visual weight (they "float"), and they also draw a far amount of attention (when carefully juxtaposed with the proper body color).

Darker hues appear to have more visual density ("gravity"), and they tend, depending a few other factors, to relax away from the eye.

Bright hues tend to advance toward. Lighter colors with grayed tones (muddy as some call them) tend to retreat, and become neutral.

Skilled experts use color as a pawn of sorts, to emphasize or de-emphasize an architectural element, and coax certain elements of a house to behave in a manner that can make architecture features do tricks!


For Instance:

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The first house has a lighter, golden body than example two, but the excessive trim is darker, receding away, and doesn't make a big deal out of the porch. Trim color choice forces the viewer (buyer!) to notice other things. The siding and the accent colors advance forward. The overall impression is heavier, and the elements that make the house memorable become a red door and bright blue accents.

The second house has a much darker body, but the trim is nearly white. This dramatically cues up the woodwork to sing loud and clear. The porch reaches out and thumps the viewer (buyer!) on the head. Accent colors are more inline with the body, and play minor supporting roles to the detail. The house stands at ATTENTION in comparison to the lazier first example.

When would the trim be better darker, you might ask?

Well, if the woodwork is nothing to write home about, or skimpy, or even mismatched, darkening the trim would force another element to come forward, like the door, or the accented details. It takes the heat off trim that is in poor repair. A house with lackluster trim should not feature it's trim. Also, if the house has different levels, a dark trim evens the discrepancy by not screaming where the rooflines are. A tall half of a house feels lowered, as if darker trim actually weighs more!




Paint it Haint: A Paint with a Colorful Past

By: Michelle Molinari


If you know what color 'Haint Blue' is, then you may be shocked to find that not everyone everywhere knows what shade this color is, or what it can to do for homeowners today. Haint Blue is most commonly used on houses in the southern region of the United States; however, many regions across the U.S. and cultures around the world describe similar protective properties of this color.

The word “haint” is European in origin, and generally refers to bodiless spirits with a less-than-nice agenda. The color Haint Blue supposedly has the unique property of repelling spooks, confusing them by blocking their ability to gain entry into a home. There are references to “haints” being unable to cross over water, so perhaps the blue color just ticks them off by reminding them of their shortcomings as paranormal entities.

First batches of haint blue paint in the U.S. in the 1850’s and were made by hand at the construction site, using raw materials such as blue-colored minerals and ochers, milk, and lime. It was noticed that bugs wouldn’t land on the dried paint, quite likely an affirmation for proponents regarding its ghost-busting abilities. However, most likely, it wasn’t the power of the color that the bugs were avoiding, but more likely, the lime the paint was made of.

Many cultures claim to be authorities on the exact shade and mystical properties of Haint Blue, which is also called Gullah Blue, Dutch Boy Blue, Dirt-Dauber Blue, and what they call it here in Louisiana… “That Blue Color Mosquitoes Hate.” The color is quite sought after, and can be found on homes, both old and new! It is especially popular for the porch ceiling and under the eaves.

Regardless of the myths surrounding Haint Blue, painting a historic house with a color with such colorful history gives us a sense of continuity, a sincere gratitude for the ingenuity of our forefathers, and an appreciation of their beliefs. It also gives us something to think about as we sip lemonade on a hot day, and stare up at the wasp’s nest anchored to our porch ceiling coated with our impotent modern-day latex Haint Blue paint.

Please be advised: The actual shade of "Haint Blue" varies, as the formulas were mixed by hand with local pigments. Haint Blue can range from a pastel violet-blue, such as a periwinkle, to a rich shade of warm turquoise, and everything in between.


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